Reid My Mind Radio – Talking Nomad Food & Feedback

June 21st, 2017  / Author: T.Reid

A bit more on our last episode’s guest Jim Paradiso, the Blind Nomad. Since we’re going to discuss some of the feedback received from the episode I thought it made sense to include some conversation around food!

If you haven’t’ listened to that episode titled Fears of a Blind Nomad you should do that before listening to this one.

Better yet, scroll down to the different ways you can subscribe to the podcast!

Transcript

Show the transcript

TR:
What’s good family.

Today’s sort of a first for Reid My Mind Radio.
We’re going to talk about some feedback from the last episode Fears of A Blind Nomad.
Which will include a bit of food talk. Get it!
Talk about Feedback… food talk!
Ok, I like making connections.
[Audio: All You Can Eat, The Fat Boys]
[Audio: RMMRadio Theme]

TR:
I think most people want feedback on things they produce. If you write a book, you want to know whether or not readers enjoyed the story, found the information useful or gained some insight into something they never knew about. What you wouldn’t want is a barrage of comments that are meant to be hurtful or just straight criticism as opposed to constructive critiques.

I don’t usually get too many comments on episodes. There are often a few Likes on Sound Cloud and Facebook and Twitter, but not much more.

I personally thought Fears of A Blind Nomad touched on a lot of issues and would stir up some sort of an emotion in the listeners. I especially thought those adjusting to blindness would have things to say. I’m not sure why but that’s not often the case. I sometimes hope that a topic would stir up some conversation around these issues that those adjusting to blindness have to grapple with. Then again, I’m sure people aren’t that comfortable having such conversations in public.

Fortunately, as a member of the Pennsylvania Council of the Blind which is a peer network of people impacted by vision loss, I asked for some direct feedback.

Some reacted to the ideas, others reacted to Jim and some went beyond.

One commenter wrote:
> I wouldn’t want a newly blinded person to think that they, in six months have to accomplish the amazing stuff that he accomplished. Rather, I would hope that they would take > away that anything they dream of, anything they want to do is possible, despite their perceived limitations.

I agree! In fact, there are certain things that make Jim equipped for living that nomad lifestyle.

Learning a new environment is more challenging to some than others.

Everyone isn’t a trail blazer. Some people do great following a path, a set of instructions while others shine in carving out a way.

Adapting to the local culture is a must. many of us are used to a certain lifestyle that we expect everywhere we go.
Food, for example, can be a challenge. For some!

JP:
The two of us had breakfast. It was $1.25 for both of us.

TR in conversation with JP:
What kind of breakfast would $1.25 get for two… what would that be?

JP:
Well it’s a big cup of they call it Horchata tea, which is a herbal tea they make down here. They serve it in a large beer mug. He had, I don’t know, some sort of a bread that they fry with something in it. I had a couple of empanadas. You know it’s a substantial breakfast. It’s not starvation food.

TR in conversation with JP:
Yeah, yeah!

JP:
It was what he wanted.
The other day I bought him breakfast and it was a full meal. I mean it was rice and soup and meat and everything else and it was $1.25.

TR in conversation with JP:
In the states, people are wondering if you’re having eggs and home fries or omelets or something like that! (laughing)

JP:
The other day I was walking down the street and … I’ll eat anything by the way, I don’t care what it is. They put it in front of me I’ll eat it. I don’t care. So I’m walking down the street and they got something that smells really good on the grill.
It was a buck so I gave her a buck for it. It smelled really good!

It was cow’s stomach.

TR in conversation with JP:
Oh wow!

JP:
With Barbecue sauce!

TR in conversation with JP:

Anything with barbecue sauce is probably good! (Laughing)

JP:
(Laughing ) It wasn’t!

The other thing is they serve guinea pig down here.

TR in conversation with JP:
Oh wow!

JP:
The way the serve it is… they take the fur off it. They cut it down the middle, remove its guts and then they shove a stick up its ass and they throw it on a barbecue grill. It has head and nails and teeth…

TR in conversation with JP:
Oh wow!

JP:
…and they throw it on the barbecue and they cook it that way, they grill it. And again it smells really good.

TR in conversation with JP:
(Laughing)

JP:
I had this thing three different ways and I still don’t like it. It’s like eating a rat.

TR in conversation with JP:
Uh! Don’t tell me you tried that too?

JP:
Of course I tried it… I told you I’ll eat anything, I don’t care. If they serve it here I’ll eat it.

TR:
Honestly, I was sort of surprised to hear that at least one person felt the piece has a whiff of super Crip. I was upset. Not at the commenter but the idea that I may have put
forward that sort of imagery.

That term refers to one of two kinds of stories in the mainstream media when it comes to people with disabilities;
the poor helpless person who can’t survive without the able bodied person in their life
The over achieving;
– Athlete with a disability
– The musical prodigy
These are just two examples. The problem with the super Crip is not that these individuals seek to accomplish these things, it’s promoted as an impossible standard others with disabilities should strive towards. Living a “normal” life as in going to work, raising a family never seems to be enough.

I don’t look at Jim as a super Crip at all. We all have unique talents and qualities that make us perfectly equipped for something. It’s our job to figure that out.

Jim never set out to be this nomad. He chose the lifestyle partially because of a lack of options.

Traveling may not be your thing. Maybe because of real or perceived fears or lack of desire.
Some find it uncomfortable due to physical limitations.

One commenter said:
> the fear of not knowing what was ahead or how I would manage would keep me pretty much on a short chain, the fear of it I guess. I will never be a world traveler, I do not have the desire to do that, but it made me look differently about things I would like to do but have not done yet.

She went on to explain how she left her comfort zone to begin online dating. I can remember a time when that was thought to be a very risky thing to do.

Challenging our comfort zones, I think that really is what Jim is encouraging. And at least one commenter summed it by writing:
> Coming to terms with vision loss can be a tough road to travel. Stories like Jim’s challenge us to continue the journey with renewed determination.

What’s wrong with challenging ourselves?

We can’t all be nomads.
Although one gentlemen poses that as people who are blind, to some extent we may already live the life of a nomad.

“Like the nomad” he wrote;
> who enters a strange land with less than perfect knowledge of the terrain and topography
we as people with vision loss have to ask similar questions and use our skills to ascertain information.

We share the need to orient ourselves both in and outdoors.

We can share access issues;
– In a foreign land the nomad if unfamiliar with the language, can’t really do much with local printed information.
– Interpreting gestures or customs presents a challenge, not because of sight but rather unfamiliarity.

For some, a real need to ask for assistance would deter them, but as the comments’ author wrote::
> Such a position could sadden and inhibit the nomad – as I think it saddens and inhibits so many persons with vision loss – but it does not need to do so…

He proposes that asking for assistance can become a way of making connections and accepting help becomes a way of starting relationships.

For Jim, forming these relationships give him the chance to offer his help and the community while giving him purpose.

As one commenter wrote;
> a blind person’s world can be small unless that person is blessed with a personality to want to expand…

How we choose to interact with people like how we interpret Jim’s story is very much based on individual perspective. Our life experiences, identity and other factors really come into play in how we process what we hear.

Not everyone has the ability to interact with strangers or make friends with ease.

If we work with the idea that being blind already has an element of being a nomad, then I think we can agree that adventures can be found in our neighborhoods or in any aspect of our lives that we choose.

It’s about challenging ourselves.

For one gentlemen who is 70 and has been blind for 20 years now; he finds adventures by traveling to unfamiliar restaurants alone. He wrote:
> Every walk is an opportunity to talk to someone new and share a conversation with a young girl, a guy from Africa or an old lady from Poland. I truly believe a blind person must strive to create the world they want to live in.

Just like a nomad!

Unlike the nomad, there’s no need to search for this podcast;
Subscribe on any podcast platform…Apple, Google Play, Stitcher, Tune In Radio
Follow the podcast on Twitter @reidmymindradio
I’m at tsreid on Twitter

I told you we’re out here!

[Audio: RMMRadio Outro]
Peace

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Reid My MindRadio – Fears of a Blind Nomad

June 7th, 2017  / Author: T.Reid

Jim Paradiso at the Inca Ruins
When I heard about Jim Paradiso, I had to find out more. He’s a Blind Nomad… I had to hear his story. Turns out it’s so much more than that… he’s forcing you to challenge what you think is possible. That is, if you believe!

Take a listen and let me know; do you believe?

Resources

Transcript

Show the transcript

TR:
What’s good fine people.

I have a lot to say about this episode so I’m just going to get right into it.

Well of course after the intro…

The best way to kick this one off…
[Audio: Been Around the World, Notorious BIG]
[Audio: RMMRadio Theme]

JP:
By the way what I’m about to tell you is true and I don’t give a damn if you believe it or not!

TR:
Any story that begins like that, well, you know it has to be good. whether it’s true or not, that’s for you to decide.

That voice you just heard is Jim Paradiso.
you can call Jim, a nomad!

A modern day nomad refers to people; often those with an online virtual business, where one’s income isn’t tied to a brick and mortar location.
Earning 60K for example and living outside of the US on various continents can really stretch that dollar.

That’s not exactly Jim’s situation. He’s been living a version of this lifestyle for over a year now and is currently in Loja, Ecuador.

According to Jim;

JP:
The adventure is the journey

TR:
With that said, let’s begin with the journey that lead Jim to Loha Ecuador.

JP:

I was talking to a friend, he was moving to Vilcabamba and I’d never heard of Vilcabamba and I said it sounds like a good name so I left to go to Vilcabamba. Which is a fifteen hour ride on a bus from. Manta to Vilcabamba. So it took me four weeks to get there.

I get into Cuenca and of course with me now I’m traveling alone for the first time. And I’m up in this Hostel, I said well OK, so I posted on FB { I’m in Cuenca, what’s there to do for a blind man traveling on his own?

TR:
Ok, , the fact that Jim is blind for most people probably makes the idea of him living a life as a nomad and traveling in unknown places, is maybe;
Very frightening?
Unbelievable?

Well, then let’s pause on the journey through Ecuador for a moment and hear what some may think is an unbelievable adventure of Jim’s vision loss
and the series of preceding events .

JP:
I had an aneurism Thirteen years ago on my left eye. And they tried to fix it and they screwed up the eye entirely. Then three years ago I woke up one morning and I had an aneurism in the other I. And I went through ocular injections and everything else that went with it and I had a bad reaction to the ocular injections which caused me to have a stroke.

so I was living with a girlfriend who decided she didn’t want to be with a blind man.

I ended up homeless. I was a month from being blind enough to qualify for Social Security. I was unemployed and Basically I was living on the couch of a motor home
that belong to a friend of mine who was in a retirement community.

So I get a phone call from my brother who was living in Ecuador and he said Well Linda is looking for a manager for a B&B would you like the job? I said, well what’s the pay. Room and board and fifty dollars a week.

Ok, I could be homeless in a motorhome in Florida or I could be homeless on a beach in Ecuador?
kind of a no brainer to me.

TR in conversation with JP:
and I’m sure fifty dollars is different in Ecuador than in Florida.

JP:
It doesn’t make any difference as long as you got food and shelter who cares about the rest of it. I live very inexpensively because that money doesn’t mean anything to me anymore.

I went for a pedicure because I couldn’t see my toe nails and I was catching them on my socks and when she cut the calluses off the bottom my feet so when I went for a walk on the beach I ended up getting third degree burns on the bottom of my feet.

I picked up a flesh eating bacteria and I had to be medivac the act from Ecuador to the United States after two operations down here and five days in the hospital.
The flesh eating bacteria that I picked up is usually fatal within seventy two hours and the only cure for it is amputation; actually they call it debridement which really is amputation. They have to remove all of the bacterial growth because it doubles in size every nine minutes.
Once I got back into the United States they put me in the teaching hospital in Shands of which this was the second case they had in fifty years of this particular virus. They amputated two toes and debride most of my foot and then they had to regrow it in an oxygen rich environment.

This took ten weeks and then they put me in a nursing home for a month. Rehab they call it but it actually was a nursing home.

While I was there I had an abscess on the back of my head so I went to the doctors when I had my foot looked at and they slants the abscess and said this isn’t right so they sent me to a Dermatologist.
Well when they slants it they gave me MRSA – which is another flesh eating bacteria. While I was at the doctor’s they said oh I don’t like these moles on your back let me have them biopsied. Well as it turned out I had skin cancer. They had to operate on my back and removed the skin cancer. Which I thought we were just going to remove a mole but they ended up doing 19 stitches on each side and trenched both sides of my back. Then they had to put me on different antibiotics in order to kill the MRSA they gave me and then when they removed that they discovered it was a tumor. Then they had to remove that. And that was in six months.

At that point I was afraid of dying.

When I finally got settled with Social Security Disability, I Flew back to Ecuador.

TR in conversation with JP:
Why?

JP:
Because my kids wanted to put me in a retirement villa.

TR in conversation with JP:
How many kids do you have?

JP:

Again that’s an odd story…

I have four kids but they’re not mine.
TR in conversation with JP:
Oh Ok!

JP:
My ex-wife’s two kids from her previous marriage.
And I have her ex-husband’s two kids from his previous marriage.

TR in conversation with JP:
OK that’s a new situation!

You have her ex-husband’s kids? (laughing!)

JP:
They all consider me dad and I was always there for them.

By the way, have you ever heard a story this ridiculous?

TR in conversation with JP:
so many people stories that I have heard of do have like one thing on top of the other you know but this flesh eating viruses and tumors, yeah… you’re winning!
– laughs!

TR:
Now, returning to Ecuador Jim met up with a friend.

JP:
He didn’t have any money and I said OK I need someone to travel with because blind people can’t travel alone!

Well I spent three weeks in the Andes and then two weeks in the Galapagos. Then we came back and we went up to Colombia – we spent three months in Colombia. Then we took a cruise and went from Cartagena through Panama, Costa Rica, Jamaica and Grand Cayman. And then circled around back and then went hiking in the mountains and Colombia

TR:
That friend Jim was traveling with was 42 and at the time Jim was 60.
Plus he was still recovering from flesh eating diseases,
multiple cancer surgeries and newly adjusting to blindness.

He learned a valuable lesson.

JP:

There are some things that are worse than traveling alone and that’s traveling with somebody else!

So at Christmas I flew back to Manta.
TR in conversation with JP:
So Jim can I ask you… you just
shared all of that … I mean you talked about a cruise and
flying to the Galapagos and stuff so you’re financing that on the Social Security?

JP:
Yeah!

TR in conversation with JP:
OK! And at this point you’re not paying rent or anything like that just traveling so you’re a Nomad.

JP:
Right, I’m a Nomad, I’m homeless.
I’m doing this on $1,127 a month.

So anyways when I got back to Manta I had infected my foot again and I had to stay off it for six weeks which drove me nuts.

So I was talking to a friend he was moving to Vilcabamba and I’d never heard of….

TR:
That brings us back to Jim’s journey.

When we left off, he was on his way to Vilcabamba
and stopped in a Hostel in Cuenca
where he posted the question

JP:
In Cuenca, what’s there to do for a blind man traveling on his own?

One guy suggested why don’t you head up to Ingaperka which is a Aztec ruin in the Andes which would be Eastern Ecuador.

TR:
So off he went to Ingaperka to find the ancient Inca Ruins.

Now if you’re thinking Jim is probably fluent in Spanish
or of course everyone speaks English,
well you’re wrong.
In fact, most people in the town of Ingaperka speak a dialect of the Incas.

JP:
The bus let me off in the middle of this town. I have no clue where I am I finally find somebody that speaks about four words of English.
And she asked me what I was doing and I say I was looking for the ruins. And she says ruins Cinco. I said Cinco kilometers. She says no Cinco minutos. I said where and she say aqui and pointed me to a road and so I walk up the road. I walk into this beautiful state park.

TR:
After receiving a tour of the ruins
well, it’s time for Jim to begin making his way to Vilcabamba.
He catches one bus to Cuenca and another to Loja.
Which is where he of course posts to Facebook:

JP:
What’s there to do for a blind man travelling alone through Loja?

Well this woman posts back well I have these two. English students who
are blind and would like to meet you. They’re sisters. So I meet them for coffee they come in on the arm of somebody crab walking because they don’t travel alone they’re in their thirty’s and they’ve been blind all their life.

They sit down and we’re talking and one of them looks at me and says who are you traveling with? I said nobody.

She Says Do you speak Spanish? I said no she said you can’t do that! I said yeah, I can!

TR:
By now you probably get the impression that the response, yes I can,
that’s something Jim is quite used to saying!

JP:
I’m here!
She takes me over to the elementary school which I’ll tell you is like a prison. Two meter high concrete walls surrounding it with broken bottles over the top of it and they’re all concrete bunkers and it’s just… it’s got mold it’s just… it’s a horrible place.

TR in conversation with JP:
Is that specifically just for blind children or is that…

JP:
Yes, it’s specifically for blind children. And there are residents there and there are day people that come from the city and this is the only blind school for elementary school children in the area. And she tells me that they don’t teach mobility there because they had to cut they cut their budget and the person they cut from the budget was the mobility trainer.

Now my experience with mobility training is I am blind
and I am mobile. There are my qualifications for the position… so now I’m the mobility trainer.

TR:
See what I mean by saying yes…
Jim not only said yes to teaching others who are blind to use the
white cane and more, but he has a pretty packed schedule.

JP:
I’m working four days a week from eleven to one at the elementary school. I work five days a week teaching conversational English at a college and I work two nights a week teaching mobility and technology at the high school.
I’m starting a nonprofit… We’ve got a doctor. Who is volunteering his time services to do prosthetic eyes on the kids that have missing eyes plus I have the Go Fund Me going…other than that I’m not really that busy!

TR:
That Go Fund me is a campaign to raise money to purchase white canes,
iPhones or iPads to provide children with GPS capabilities
in order to improve their mobility.

You can find more at:
http://GoFundMe.com/3noxfco

If you’re wondering what are the living conditions for a blind nomad
in Ecuador
Jim says his apartment in Ecuador
would probably rent for several thousand in New York City.

JP:
It’s the studio penthouse with a balcony view of the mountains. Glass all the way around its fully furnished. It has a hot tub, a walk in shower. The bathroom is ten by twenty and I pay $350 a month for it including utilities.

TR:
Jim’s a volunteer! He’s not paid for any of his work.
Well not in the traditional sense!

JP:
What I get from a kid who comes up and hugged me. You know – I’ve got children that actually… they don’t speak the language that I speak and they cannot express themselves on how much they really appreciate me.

I get people hugging me all the time. That’s what I get paid in!

While I still have work to do here I’m not leaving. It’s just different it’s a different lifestyle I found a place where they need me so I’m staying. When they don’t need me any more I’ll go somewhere else.
TR in conversation with JP:
How do you feel today about everything that happened? That whole crazy story you told me.

JP:
I will tell you something that you will very seldom hear from a blind person.

Going blind was the greatest opportunity of my life! Without that none of this would have happened. And that’s how I look at it.

TR:
And isn’t that what it boils down too!
How we choose to look at it!

Jim is actually looking for an assistant volunteer
to join him in Ecuador.
He needs help with some of those things he’s doing like
teaching mobility and technology.

He can provide room and board, but
the candidate needs to pay for their own travel.
Oh, yes, and the candidate must be blind.

Jim can be contacted directly through his Facebook page titled:
Blind Jim Can’t do That!
(Yeh, I can!)

I’m Thomas Reid
for Gatewave Radio,
[JP: I don’t give a damn if you Believe it or not ]
Audio for Independent Living.

TR:
I have never described myself as a journalist.
In fact, I make sure to say, I’m not.
I am a self-described Advocate who uses audio to make a point.
I don’t hide my opinion,
I choose the stories I want to tell and have a real solid perspective.
The idea of a journalist is that they supposedly don’t have that bias.
I don’t believe that at all!
However, A journalist would have done some real fact checking of Jim’s story.

They would have contacted various sources to try and confirm
his account of the events.

I am a New Yorker,
I instinctively don’t believe you!
It’s something I am really trying to rid myself of but it’s so ingrained in my being it’s really hard to separate.

I know there are some who will listen to this and not believe him.

Some will assume he has some residual vision – and say
that’s the reason he can do it.

Jim does have a bit of light perception which allows him
to see shadows out of a part of one eye.

Some will think it’s his nature.
Well, it’s probably fair to say Jim is something of an adventurer.
Before losing his sight he was a professional scuba diver diving throughout
the US and Caribbean.

That included salvage work for insurance companies, body recovery,
owning his own diving school and treasure diving in the Caribbean.

So here’s the thing…

I do believe Jim.

Jim is 100 percent telling the truth about the fears of a blind traveler.

Those fears are not just contained within the person who is blind.

You know that because as you were listening you felt uncomfortable.

You know you did.

I don’t care if you are sighted or
any degree of blind, you felt it!

I felt it! And feeling that way upset me.

I travel alone to different states but I had a fully planned itinerary.

Jim’s story made me challenge how I look at the world
and what I really believe is possible.

During our conversation a woman interrupted Jim and I asked him to explain what happened.

JP:
some woman just walked up to me and said You’re an inspiration to the people down here. I overheard your conversation.

I have people walking up to me on the street constantly doing that.

TR in conversation with JP:
How does that feel?

JP:
I don’t think I’m anything special.

I think everybody has it within themselves just that I choose to do that my question to people is Why don’t you choose to do it.

There are so many people out there that don’t want to leave their house and it bothers me.

TR in conversation with JP:
Why?

JP:
I’ve met so many blind people in my. Limited time being blind. And most of them tell me that they have limitations on everything they do.

You know they tell me it’s OK that you can do this but I can’t and then they give me a list of reasons why they can’t.

TR in conversation with JP:
What are some of those reasons?

JP:
Oh I could get hurt I could fall down. I could get lost.

So what’s the big deal you don’t think I get lost you don’t think I fall down you don’t think I get hurt?

TR:
I think it’s fair to acknowledge that the emotions behind these thoughts are real. But Fear you may have heard
is an acronym for False evidence appearing real.

You know what else is real!

Our perspective!
And we can actually control that!

JP:
I survived cancer. I’m blind. I survived the flesh eating bacteria What are you going to do to me that God hasn’t done already? It’s true! What fear do I have now. They told me I was going to die on three different occasions.

TR in conversation with JP:
you know you’re going to go at some point.

JP:
Right, we’re all gonna go some time!
I’d rather go out swinging then go out crying.

There is nothing holding you back but yourself.
I was at a Blind I Can meeting I can do is what they call it…

And they were talking about having an outing and they were talking about going out to lunch.

I mean, what is going to lunch proof for a blind person. Everybody eats!

They asked me what my idea of a good outing was…

There’s a place in Florida in Orlando called Machine Gun America. It’s automatic weapons… what the hell could possibly go wrong!

TR in conversation with JP:
Laughing!… I love it!

JP:

Make yourself feel alive.

You’re dead, nobody’s told you!

TR:
Jim, like many who lose their vision later in life, especially over the age of 55, never even had real mobility training.

JP:
My mobility training consisted of twenty minutes.

I learned everything on the internet and by myself reading books so when
they finally picked up my paperwork they put me through … they put me in front of a mobility trainer who told me that in familiar surroundings I was Ok, but I needed work in unfamiliar surroundings.

So I was hiking staying at an Echo lodge called Ukuku in Columbia it’s outside of Ibagué.

It’s a two kilometer hike up a mountain across three rivers. To get to this and the last river you crossed There’s a log and you got to balance on a log to cross the river.

Now do you know the proper caning technique for crossing a log bridge?

TR in conversation with JP:
Laughing… No I do not!

I think mine would be to straddle the log and then slowly go across. That would be my technique.
But that’s just me!

JP:

So I had to call back to the person who was in charge of the mobility training and I said, hey Tom what’s the proper caning techniques for crossing a log bridge?

TR in conversation with JP: To the avenue.
Oh my gosh! Did they have any advice for you?

JP:
Oh hell no.

TR:
But don’t get it twisted,
Jim isn’t some sort of blind Evel Knievel.
(If you’re younger than 40 Google him!

Jim is practical about his travel.

JP:
I have a theory. It’s really simple when I get to a town if I check into a Hostel I get the business card of the Hostel, put it in my wallet.

If I get really lost I take the business card and I give it to a cab driver and I ask the cab driver donde esta aqui… where is this? And he takes me there.

TR:
That practical advice goes beyond travel…

JP:
I’m trying to convince people that just because you have a problem doesn’t mean you can’t get your ass out and do something.

I listen to people tell me they can’t get a job. Well, go volunteer and get some experience!

TR:
I’m hoping to speak with Jim again.

And who knows maybe that will be in person, in Ecuador.

There are links on Reid My Mind.com to both the Go Fund Me and his Facebook page if you want to communicate directly with Jim.

I usually close with my reminder for you to subscribe to the podcast…

well today, I’m closing out with part of a favorite quote taken from Jim’s Facebook page.

Maybe someone will find it helpful… I think Jim may have.

Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.”

Peace

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Reid My Mind Radio – The Gift

May 24th, 2017  / Author: T.Reid

Picture of Jay Worthington

Jay Worthington knew he wanted to act from an early age.

Struggling to accept his blindness, fighting the bullying and discrimination; he searched for something more… The Gift!

While listening to “The Gift” is a present for the listener there’s more to this episode. I’ve been inspired to stretch my own creative chops with acting, impressions and and an original rap!

Now time to unwrap this episode and recieve The Gift! Then Subscribe to make sure you don’t miss any future episodes.

Resources

Transcript

Show the transcript

TR:
Wasup good people? I got a goodie!
Then again, maybe I shouldn’t go on the limb like that.

Like so many things, listening to a story or a song, reading a book or watching a movie or play…
any response to that piece of work is subjective. I may like it and you may think it sucks! And that’s ok, you can be wrong some time!

I’ll share more about this latest piece for Gatewave Radio a little later, but for now you take a listen and maybe you can
tell me what you like or dislike about it. I think I am open to that. Again, I don’t mind if you’re wrong!

Ok, now lights, camera…. it’s showtime!

[Audio: Reid My Mind Radio Theme Intro]
]

JW:
“We will never work with him we will never bring him into so much as audition because he will never work with those eyes on camera.”

My name is Jay Worthington. I’m thirty three years old. I live in Chicago Illinois. I’m a professional actor and a teaching artist.

When I was like four or five years old my dad took
me to see Batman in the movie theaters. The original Tim Burton Batman. I was just trance fixed by it. After the movie when we were walking out in the parking lot at 4 or five years old I turned to him. That’s what I want to do!

TR:
That experience was more than a movie, it was his first time receiving the gift.

Not all gifts are obvious. Lots of things have to fall into place in order for that gift to be recognized

JW:
I was born completely blind. I was also born months premature.

My parents got called into this doctor’s office and apparently he pulled out a gigantic book of Braille and was like you know you should take this home and look it over. Your
child is blind.

TR:
Jay was born with a rare visual condition called Ocular Albinism.

JW:
Which causes my eyes to move; sort of an uncontrollable erratic movement that I have no conscious awareness of. It just happens. As I
got older and older my vision began to improve and around the time I was two years old I could see in shadows. My vision steadily got better and better until puberty in which it bottomed out and will remain the same for the remainder of my life. And it’ll deteriorate a little bit just like anybody’s
vision as I get older. And it already has but I am legally blind but I do have some vision.

When my parents could obviously start to tell that I was picking
up visual cues, I think they were freaking out. I think they were pretty overjoyed.

TR:
Jay’s parents had access to one specialist in ocular albinism. His summary of Jay and his abilities?

JW:
The doctor would usually just say it’s a miracle. Really there is no explanation for how he’s able to do what he does, he shouldn’t be able to. do certain things that he can do.

TR:
Another gift.

I know, growing up legally blind it’s pretty hard to imagine this being a gift, but stay with me and I’ll show you.

It’s said, You have to bear the burdens before you can receive the blessings.

First, the burdens..

JW:
it took me a really long time to come to terms
with my vision.

The problems started occurring when I got into grade school and the bullying started. A lot of bullying I encountered growing up. I was one
of those kids who eight times out of ten I’m not going to back down. I was getting in a lot of fist fights and a lot of scuffles growing up
and losing most of them because I’m a blind kid [He laughs!]. But there was just this anger in feeling like I was being persecuted for something I had no control over.

TR:
The blessing!

JW:
I took a drama class in middle school and I was in.

From the moment I was born to fourteen years old I don’t have any recollection of anybody; my parents,
a teacher or a friend, anybody ever telling me I was good at anything.

I’m not saying that is indeed the case I’m saying I really and truly don’t
remember if somebody did tell me I was good at something before that.

It was scary going up with this kid that I knew didn’t like me and made fun of me because I was this awkward kid and made fun of my eyes. I didn’t go out there with the intention of mess with him in the scene or anything, I just wanted to go up there and play and just have that freedom. Almost immediately the moment it started I just felt home. It just felt so natural and so right.

I remember getting done with the scene and that kid coming up to me that did the scene with me, and being like Man and he put his hand on my shoulder and was like, you’re really good at this like that was awesome man. There were more kids in that class than just this guy that bullied me and made my life a little difficult who are now coming up to me being like Jay like we didn’t know we didn’t know you could do this. This is crazy, you’re awesome. I just remember
feeling wow people are positively supporting me in something I’m doing. This is a remarkably new feeling!

TR:
On that stage he found home!
that’s a gift many people never really receive.
Finding that one thing or place where they truly feel comfortable and can express themselves.
If Jay were writing the script for his life play or movie at that early age,
I’m sure he would’ve chosen to make that early acting experience the point at which all of the bullying ends.

JW:
the bullying never really stopped from first grade to senior year of high school. I remember getting out of high school and be in like thank God I’m going to college. Going to be around adults. Nobody’s
ever going to disparage me or judge me for my vision ever again.

I was wrong!

TR:
Unfortunately, bullies are a part of the real world. They grow up to have jobs like college professors who told Jay he’d never get work in the business.
They even work in casting agencies.

JW:
Excluding one casting office. All of the major casting offices in the city have either told me or told my agent we will never work with him we will never
bring him into so much as audition because he will never work with those eyes on camera; there’s no way!

These people have no idea they’re practicing discrimination. None! That same person would never in a million years go to a person of color or a person with a different type of sexuality or a transgendered person and
tell them hey I’m not going to bring you in because of the color of your skin. I’m not going to bring you in because of your gender or your sexuality. The same people that would make that call against me would be outraged and offended if they even heard somebody making that call against somebody else. That’s to me what’s amazing about the disabled experience.

Going through my life and experiencing this feeling of constant discrimination on a certain level just
kept building this anger.

I can tell it got to a point where I woke up one day twenty eight twenty nine years old took a look in the mirror and it’s like
you’re a highly functioning alcoholic. With a huge dependency problem. You’re miserable, you’re angry all the time, your girlfriend can’t hardly
stand you half the time, cause You’re never sober you’re a train wreck. Just all this anger. Over trying to do this thing that that alone makes sense
of the world to me and all I seemed to feel like I hear is people telling me it’s never going to happen.

TR:
It was an acting role that would help Jay come to terms with his internal anger.
Come to terms with his vision loss.

The role forced him to act on stage completely blind.

JW:
There was a huge shift in my work at that point. Acting had always been this quasi spiritual practice to me. When I did that play, it stopped being a quasi-spiritual practice and became a full blown healing ritual. There was something about going out there every night and telling
this story. That I think just made me come to terms with something that I’d been fighting for twenty nine years. Six months later I was sober. I haven’t had a drink in three and a half years. I just actively started turning a lot of stuff around and just getting better and better every day as I continue to do to this day. But it was that play in getting sober and really asking myself Is it this industry in these people that are holding you back? Or is it you realizing that no matter what these people say they’re not the ones holding me back. It’s me because I’m taking the outrageous information that they’re giving me. Information that’s based on nothing. They don’t know anything about disability. I think it was when I got sober and started tearing down all those beliefs and filling the void where those beliefs were with good positive beliefs about myself and deepening a spiritual practice and deepening
my relationship with God, that’s when everything started to turn around.

TR:
That’s the Gift of enduring trials and tribulations and
finding strength deep within.
Along with a belief in something greater than yourself.

Once again, it was through his stage experience that led Jay to more self-discovery.
Trying to tap into a role, a director and friend recommended Jay read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.
This helped Jay find lots of other writers focusing
on eastern philosophies and religions including Buddhism.
Jay says his spirituality consists of
pieces of different philosophies that help him find his way through life.

After working all types of day jobs to support himself
Jay decided to try and pair his original goal of becoming a teacher with his love of acting.
In 2012 Jay began teaching acting classes during the day.
Combining the two proved to be even more beneficial than Jay probably thought.

JW:
At this point in my life it’s become just as big and just as equal level as acting.
I believe that acting is a holistic practice. I believe that it’s healing for the audience as well as for the performer.

A huge part of my life right now is how do I incorporate teaching acting as a holistic practice into my teaching. What sort of techniques can I create to show and illustrate the healing properties of this work and how they can open somebody up.

I have zero interest as a teacher in making people better actors. I have great interest in helping people to be the best version of themselves. As the best human beings they can be. If you do that that acting stuff will take care of itself.

TR:
Acting for 20 years and 10 of those professionally,
Jay has played all types of roles including Shakespeare and premiere roles bringing with them unchartered territory offering freedom to interpret and approach the role.

But what he really l loves are those roles that scare him.
They cause him to question his abilities and reach even further.
That too is a gift.

The gift of being challenged at your craft.
Especially when that’s something that drives you.

With all of these different roles and experiences auditioning, there was one he thought he’d never see.

Then one day, out of the blue, 2 separate friends on the same day alerted Jay to an open casting call that he just couldn’t believe…

JW:
I’ve never in my life heard of an audition post where they were looking for a visually disabled person.

TR:
He contacted the casting agency, auditioned on camera via Skype.

JW:
I think it was like the day before Thanksgiving they emailed me
and said are you ready to fly out to L.A.

TR:
After all of the years of being bullied for his blindness imagine how that must have felt to be
sought out as an actor with vision loss.

On top of that Jay received the star treatment.
He was flown out to Los Angeles, put up in a nice hotel,
he even had his own driver.

The role was for a public service announcement –
an initiative of a website and campaign called Blind New World.
their objective?
Challenge us all to test our own biases and fears about blindness
with a hope of creating a new world… a blind new world.

And Jay’s role?

The handsome guy in the PSA entitled the get together.

JW:
You’re trying on a million different outfits and then they’re taking you into this room full of these producers. And the producers are just standing there talking about you like you’re not even in the room. Every time I go in with a new outfit they’d be like you know he looks too handsome he’s got to be a little nerdy. And then finally I went in, they’re like oh he looks like a nerd and I was like great thanks guys. Thanks.

TR:
Now, I’ve been called handsome before,… (thanks mom!)
But two words never heard after my name… too handsome!

the final gift, it’s unexpected, it’s not what he thought he wanted, but I suspect it’s something his heart was seeking.

JW:
My whole life up to that point I’d always felt like an outcast. It always felt like an observer sort of on the edges of things.

I just wanted to be this freelance actor who hopefully got to a Point One day where, I’m doing a show at this theater now I’m doing a show at this theater over here. Being this freelance guy going wherever he’s needed.
What ultimately happened was I was asked to join an ensemble – a group of actors who live together, work together for years and years and years. Who are a family taking care of each other and loving each other. Taking that energy and that love out on stage every night. And in my opinion it’s the finest theater in the country.

TR:
Some may see irony in the name of the ensemble.
Call it what you want, but I’m choosing to see this as something greater at work,
something more divine, destiny !

JW:
The gift Theatre Company, the company I’m a part of; this huge family. They are blood they are my biological family I would do anything for these people. I love them and cherish them I’ve never felt the level of acceptance and love that I feel from these people.

What actually happened has given me everything. I feel like. Just about the luckiest guy. You know?

TR:
Yeah! You found your tribe.

JW:
Yeah that’s the best way to put it I feel so blessed!

TR:
I’m Thomas Reid…

JW:
Being this freelance guy going wherever he’s needed.

TR:
For Gatewave Radio, audio for independent living!

[Audio bumper…]

TR:

I may have said this before, but doing this podcast is very special to me.

Writing and Editing the podcast is definitely time intensive, but I like so many things about the process. Finding a way to connect the story,
thinking about the lessons and how they relate to me personally.

Editing for Gatewave though, that’s hard especially when those you talk to give you really good stuff to work with.

This was the first time I decided to have two versions of the same story.
This version while branded Gatewave, is not the same that was submitted to my Gatewave Producer Toby.
She understandably needs a more abridged version to fit into a scheduled show…,
but there was so much I wanted to include. Even in the natural flow of the episode, there were things that I left out and decided to incorporate right here.

[TR in conversation with Jay:]
Talking about Hollywood, what’s
your take. On non-disabled people playing roles of people with disabilities.

JW:
I don’t necessarily have..
[hesitation…]
No there’s no way around it for me it infuriates me!

[TR and Jw laugh!]

I can’t come to …, I’m trying to be level with this interview and I don’t want to I don’t I don’t want to offend anybody but it really does.

Like Star Wars Rogue One.
There is a blind character in that. In that movie he is played by a martial artist to who I I’m sure has twenty twenty vision I think
his name is Donnie Yen and he’s an incredible martial artist but yeah he’s a guy with able bodied vision and he’s playing a blind character and I
am of the belief that if you spend enough time with a visually disabled actor that they’re going to be able to do martial arts. They’re going to be able to do whatever they need to do. I very much subscribe to the belief that a disabled person can do anything an able bodied person can. And in many instances I think disabled people can exceed what the able bodied can do because their level of faith their level of belief in themselves naturally has to be so much greater than the average human beings.

It really angers me.

A really good buddy of mine who is the artistic director of the theater company I’m a part of, he’s a very well-known actor in Chicago who works in a wheelchair. He’s got the same thing it’s like if you’ve got a character in a play or in a movie who’s in a wheelchair and you cast a guy who can walk and doesn’t use a wheelchair in life. There are far greater number of disabled actors
out there working than people are aware of and it’s so rare to even see a disabled character in a major film, T.V. show anything because we don’t want to show that to the world right now. We want to show perfection. We want to show a perfect reality so in the rare instance that there actually is a role written where the character is disabled. It would seem Yeah you should cast a disabled actor.

TR:
By the way, why is there always that blind guy in movies who is more than often black and runs a news stand?
He usually has some extra powerful sense of smell, which folks, that’s not true. It’s not more powerful it’s just used more.

And for the record, I can play that role! Watch…
“That will be 2.50 Luke. Yes, I knew it was you by the sound of your boots 10 blocks away, plus I smelled that Egyptian musk oil you always wear.

Marvel, get at me!

Anyway, I’m happy with the slightly abridged version of this story submitted to Gatewave
and I think it contains the main points.

Like the power of bullying.

For lots of people of my generation, bullying is a new concept. Many of us looked at that as kids will be kids without really considering the repercussions.
I was never a bully! I got into some fights but don’t recall initiating many.
I had experiences of being bullied to some extent but
even that I still view as a sort of neighborhood rites of passage.
The older guys in your neighborhood test you. When you stick up for yourself you get props. You earn the occasional head nod from them and maybe
… what up little man!

But that’s not everyone’s experience.
Over the now 19 almost 20 years of being a Dad I come to view bullying differently.
I learned of real situations and see the impact it has on people even when they are older.

As a Dad, I really felt it when Jay talked about never hearing he was good at something until 14 in his drama class.

I am pretty certain my children wouldn’t say that, I think I may have done the opposite and told them, they were good at stuff they had no business doing!
I’m just kidding!

The main thing I walk away with from this story is finding the gifts.
Jay literally found his.

I have found some of mine, but I guess I find myself searching for more.
That’s not appreciating what I have, it’s just more like feeling as though I have more to do.

One gift I definitely recognized with this last episode is the opportunity this podcast provides me with meeting cool, interesting people.

If I’m going to be honest, ever since losing my sight my access to cool conversations with new interesting people, well that’s been greatly reduced.

Some of that is due to my access – getting out here in the Poconos isn’t the easiest thing to do.
There’s no bus service near me and para transit sucks and
even then, people tend to limit their interactions…
well all of that is probably the topic for a separate podcast.

Looking at that from the same lens as which I viewed Jay’s story, things tend to fall into place.

I don’t know if I would have began podcasting or rekindled my relationship with audio production
if I hadn’t experienced vision loss.
I really don’t know what my life would have been like.
I don’t think it makes much sense to even give that too much thought.

What I do know is it was an incredible feeling when I received an email from a listener who said how much they appreciate the stories. They recommended the show to another person who I believe is adjusting to vision loss.

That’s what I want!
I want to know that people adjusting to blindness or something are digging this and possibly find something in the stories.
I want to know someone received some help…
There’s a lot of real practical help in many of these episodes. Some may be considered inspirational, but honestly I don’t go for that…
all of these stories are people from different backgrounds, countries,
genders, ethnicities, but there all people.

I tried to interview a guide dog a few months ago…
I thought I could make it work, his name was Scooby!
(Rooby Roo!)

Or maybe I was feeling a little Shaggy that day! LOL!
Sorry!

On the real though, I felt there was something for others ever since I began realizing this experience of blindness isn’t inherently bad. Becoming aware that it’s not the blindness, it’s not the disability it’s our society and the way disability and definitely blindness is viewed.
The barriers are put there by society.

If you’re listening to this and don’t get that, first of all thank you so much for listening. You should contact me at reidmymindradio@gmail.com. You should explore this idea for yourself and I think it’s going to open your eyes.
No pun! Just the way we speak in this sighted world!

Well there’s always big pun!
Can we start some sort of internet thing where when someone mentions a pun we have to play a Big Pun verse?

Since I’m talking rappers, let me bless you with an original TReid verse and I’m kickin it Acapulco.
(Acapella!)

Reid My Mind Radio, it’s about to be done
I hope you learned a bit and had some fun!
Even though it’s recorded you are listening live
Before I sign off, let me get you to subscribe
The more who do, the better chance for discovery,
rollin with RMM you get production see
it’s not just turning on the mike and talking bro
I give you writing, editing a real produced show
Apple Podcast, Google Play
Stitcher, Tune IN, nothing left to say.

Ok, don’t forget to subscribe and if I get enough, I’ll stop the corny jokes and rapping!

I’d probably would have more subscribers if…
[Scooby Doo… wasn’t for those stupid kids…]

[Audio: RmmRadio Theme Outro]
Peace!

Hide the transcript

Reid My Mind Radio – A Captain & Her Guide Dog

May 10th, 2017  / Author: T.Reid

Yes, guide dogs are cute! They are gentle animals that are trained to help those who are blind or visually impaired travel. Some know they shouldn’t pet these dogs while they are performing their jobs. Then again, some know but still act…
Liz and Bryce Krispy paired at Guide Dog School

In this episode we hear from Liz Oleksa who shares a story about an incident between her, her guide dog Bryce Krispy, a mother and daughter… what could go wrong?
Picture of Guide Dog Bryce Krispy wearing sunglasses!

We also hear from Dr. Andre Watson who shares some insight on this experience and the message it tells us about society and its perceptions of people with disabilities and other marginalized groups outside the dominant culture.

Plus, some great advice for anyone in need of checking your own self-identity after experiencing micro-aggressions. And it’s ok, don’t be scared to listen… I know I mentioned blind and disability, but really, there’s something here for everyone!!

Now, all aboard for another episode! Hit Play & then Subscribe to Reid My Mind Radio!

Transcript

Show the transcript

TR:
What’s good everybody! Welcome to another episode of Reid My Mind Radio!

I thought we could try going a little more in depth with one story.

generally, the stories on Reid My Mind Radio tend to have a positive spin. More than often, these stories and interviews revolve around the broad topic of adjusting to blindness.

Sometimes we need to hear about the problems, the reality.

And then discover the valuable lessons within.

That’s today, but first… you know how we do it

[Audio: Reid My Mind Theme…]


LO
I’m Liz Oleksa. and I live in Macungie with my son Logan who just turned 13 and my guide dog Bryce Krispy.

TR:
Macungie, Pennsylvania.

LO:
Yes Sir!

TR:
How long have you had Bryce Krispy?

LO:
May 21, of this year will be three years that Bryce and I have been together.

TR:
Is that his full name Bryce Krispy or did you put the Krispy?

LO:
Well at the school they called him Bryce Krispy, but on all his paper work it just says Bryce. So I use both. He likes when I call him Bryce Krispy his tail wags a lot faster. He really recognizes that as his name cause he knows he’s super sweet.

[Audio: Sound of rain and city sidewalk]

I was at a doctor’s appointment and I had just finished up . I had scheduled my pickup for 11:30 with my local transportation. It was raining so I waited outside but yet under the overhang. And I’m a people person so you know I hear somebody walking up I’ll say hi. This lady came up and I didn’t know it was a lady at first and I said “Hi how are you today?” She said Fine and there was a little girl; I am assuming it was a little girl with her. Around 5 six at most. She sounded kind of short so I am assuming she was younger. The little girl was really bubbly and they’re both talking and you know the cutie puppy talk; “Oh look at the god, look at the dog.” The little girl said, “We can’t touch the doggie, right? He’s a really pretty doggie, we can’t touch her?” I said, no you can’t touch him honey I’m sorry he’s working. The mom even said no you can’t touch the puppy, but he is really pretty. The girl said again, “We can’t touch the puppy.” And she’s starting to get a little I guess anxious? I said no honey I’m sorry you can’t touch him he’s working. As a handler if you distract him I could get hurt. Well now she starts yelling, “We can’t touch the puppy!” And the lady’s like “No honey we can’t touch the puppy.” And the girl yelled , I could hear her she was starting to jump around… “We can’t touch the puppy!” And I felt Bryce moving a little funny so I reached down and here the woman was petting the dog. Now she herself told her daughter don’t touch the dog, the daughter told her don’t touch the dog, I told her don’t touch the dog. So I said to the lady kind of calm at first but a little stern I said, ” Mam, please don’t touch the dog he’s working. Both your daughter and I and you just told you not to touch the dog. She goes, oh well its ok, I mean I just can’t help it look at his eyes. Now Bryce , I have been told has the most beautiful honey colored eyes. He’s a yellow lab and he has very very unique eyes, but I don’t care how cute his eyes are it’s still not ok. You know but she’s like, Oh itis ok I just can’t help myself. And I stopped and said Mam stop touching my dog. Now the little girl’s screaming she’s crying don’t touch the dog, don’t touch the dog. I’m getting frustrated so I reach down, just like I was taught at school, if somebody is touching your dog and you’ve kindly asked them you have permission to remove their hand from your dog because that do is an extension of you.

I reach down and I took her hand and I wasn’t rough but I took her hand and pushed it away.
She gasped when I took her hand off my dog She backed up and slapped me across the face and said you have some nerve to invade my personal space like that. I just stood there with my mouth kind of hanging open like “Are you serious right now?” And she said let’s go and she and her little girl went off either into the building or they left. I was too shocked at the time as to … oh my goodness you just slapped me across the face., but yet she was the one who invaded my personal space and my boundaries.

TR:
You heard correctly, slapped in the face!

With that in mind I wanted to examine this situation from a professional perspective.

AW:
Hi my name is Dr. Andre Watson. I’m a Clinical Psychologist in the Philadelphia area.

TR:
I had the opportunity to speak with Dr. Watson last year. We talked about some of his experiences growing up blind and the challenges he faced in attaining his doctorate in Psychology. If you haven’t heard that episode, I suggest you go back and give it a listen.

I asked Dr. Watson to unpack some of what took place in the incident you just heard from Liz as well as what he referred to as…
AW:
… what we have to deal with as blind people trying to make it in America.

[TR in conversation with AW]

Make it in the world cause hopefully people outside of America listen to this too. (Laughs!)

AW:

Absolutely!

Personally and professionally I hear about these kind of stories happening all the time with blind people whether it be with a guide dog or with a cane or with freedom. With he right to make a decision for you own self. And I think this was a clear case of disrespect and disregard for Liz as a person. A person with a brain, a person with choice. And so it really upset me to hear this story not because it’s not common, but because it is so common and so many people that are blind who are trying to live an independently life not only have to deal with some natural barriers to independence but also some of the social barriers to independence. SO Liz established like any dog owner, like any parent, you have established a boundary which you need to do, and so somebody else disregarded that . On one hand I would take it personally and on the other hand I wouldn’t. Because a lot of time people that do these kinds of things disregard a lot of people’s boundaries. This could have been a women who has been disrespected herself in her own life and now is doing that to other people. Bullying is a real issue and people that bully look for people that they see as being weaker and vulnerable. Ironically, people that do bully have been bullied. This is all about perception. Blind people being seen as vulnerable, being seen as less capable, less aware.

TR:
Being seen as vulnerable based on someone’s perception,
well no one can really be immune to these types of experiences. even those who can thoroughly recognize them for what they are.

I actually had a similar experience with my guide dog. I sat down on the bus. The dog is under the seat and the woman sitting to my right
tells me oh, the dog’s fine. And I’m thinking she’s saying the dog’s fine because the dog’s not intruding on her space. As I was checking my dog feeling her, make sure she was out of the way, but really what she was saying was she’s fine so that I can pet her. I reach up and I feel this woman’s hand on my dog and I say, oh excuse me please don’t pet my dog.

As much as I would like to think that people are fair and that they want not to take advantage of blindness or each other’s disability, that’s not the case.

People abuse children every day. People take advantage of people that they think they can get over on, all the time. And it might not be a willful planned activity, but it still happens

TR:
In case you’re unfamiliar with the issue when it specifically involves guide dogs and petting them…
That dog has been trained to work and concentrate on the task at hand while in that harness. The only instructions it should follow are from the handler. What may seem like harmless petting can lead to the dog becoming distracted and potentially not relaying important information or responding properly to the handler.

But it goes beyond guide dogs, beyond these specific incidents; as Dr. Watson explained, it’s about how we and others with disabilities are perceived.
Once again!

AW:
…what we have to deal with as blind people trying to make it in America.
How should we deal with these kinds of issues when they happen?
First what you don’t do is that you don’t stop going out. You don’t stop asserting yourself. That’s the hard part right there is to be resilient in the face of some of these obstacles. Secondly is to bring some awareness to these kinds of things to everyone that this is unacceptable. First of all petting the dog from the beginning was unacceptable.

TR:
In no way is this podcast about judging how Liz responded. She has the right to choose what is appropriate for her.

It just so happens, the steps Liz took, were right in line with what would be recommended for anyone in such a situation.

Let’s return to Liz still waiting for her local transportation company immediately after the incident.
And if you have ever waited for a para transit, you know how long that can take.

[And yes, shots fired! Para transit, step your game up!]

LO:
The bus is forty minutes late and I just stood there.

I wasn’t angry with the woman I was more disturbed by her lack of respect for my personal space and for the example she was selling her child. I can’t imagine if this is what I just went through asking her not to do something what the little girl must have to go through. My heart just went out to both of them for mainly the mother’s ignorance.

[TR in conversation with Liz]
Were you in shock?

LO:
I’m not going to lie, I actually had like a smirk on my face. Like Are you… serious, what really just happened here?

I was being friendly and said hello. My dog is doing his job. He’s sitting next to me not bothering anyone. Don’t they teach us in elementary school you hear the word stop or know you stop?

[TR in conversation with Liz]
has that changed you in any way?

LO:
I don’t want people to think that, don’t talk to me. Absolutely you know what, I want people to talk to me. Don’t talk to my dog though. You know talk to me, I’m the person. You have a question about my dog he’s not going to answer you so you don’t need to ask him.

“Oh are you taking good care of your mommy?”

I can answer your questions for you.

[TR in conversation with Liz:]
is that an actual thing that you hear?

LO:
oh my goodness yes!

When I leave places people are like “now you take good care of your mommy.”

“You show mommy how to get home!”

No, no I tell him how to get home. He just follows my commands.

There’s a time and a place for me to fight that battle too. If
I have the extra time I may start up a conversation with a person and be like Hey just so you know talk to me. It’s not about necessarily proving a point. Some people just don’t know!

The whole bus ride home I just was trying to wrap my mind around this. It took about an hour.

I made a post on Facebook about
it to kind of spread awareness. And I laughed at times. And after I posted it I cried. I wasn’t sad for myself I was really just sad for this woman and then I was like if I could see I probably would have slapped her back. But, then again that’s an afterthought and I don’t want to resort to. Ducking to her level?

I got quite a bit of negative feedback.

I had people telling me that my response to the situation was wrong and I should have contacted the police and file a police report

[TR in conversation with Liz]
Were these other guide dog users?

LO:
. Some of them were. Some of them were cane users. Some of them were sighted. I mean just people from all different aspects of my life

AW:
that’s called blaming the victim

TR:
Once again, Dr. Watson.

AW:
We do that a lot because something really terrible happens we can’t accept that it happened. It’s always easy to do Monday morning
quarterbacking and look back and say oh I would have been there so I would have done that. Who would expect to be slapped in the face by anybody? Nobody plans on that. You don’t know when that’s going to happen
[TR in conversation with Dr. Watson]
one of the reasons I wanted to call you Andre was because when we last spoke you mentioned something and I think you referred to it as the identity check. And it was these types of well I guess micro aggressions right that sometimes you have
AW:
yes

[TR in conversation with Dr. Watson]
You get them and then you have to kind of go back and talk to yourself in the mirror Bill yourself back up. What would you say that people who experience these types of things in terms of kind of checking their identity. What advice would you give?

AW:
Definitely you need to be. Talking to somebody who knows you. Who can validate who you are.

You can talk about how this one event doesn’t define you. Whether it’s interpreting it as being vulnerable or weak or being second class; because these little things like this can happen. Like you know that slow drip of micro aggressions can happen and slowly eat away at someone’s
confidence. It’s helpful to be able to be around people that understand you. It’s great to be in a community of other blind people that you can talk to and they can share maybe share some similar experiences. It’s also good to be and situations where you feel like you’re on equal footing with people.

This is not some kind of militant radical idea but it’s good to be with family. By that I mean it’s good to be around people who have shared experiences as you. you don’t have to worry about being slapped. You know have to worry about people petting your dog when they shouldn’t do that. In many ways you have to put on an armor
when you go out so that you can remember who you are but that’s very emotionally taxing. It wears on your mind, from your thoughts to how you think about yourself. How you think about other people. You become angry, bitter, hostile. You could doubt yourself emotionally. You could be down on yourself. In some cases people actually feel it in their bodies. So you’ve got headaches and backaches and if you’re like me you like to have an extra piece of cake.

[TR in conversation with Dr. Watson:]
Laughs!

AW:
It’s good to be aware of these things and how they can affect you. And you make sure that you’re not consumed by it.

I know I’ve heard lots of stories from sighted people. They always say
oh oh I met a blind guy he was just so mean to me or blind woman she was so mean to me. Well these are the things that happen; things that happen to Liz, they happen to me and to you. And then you do get callous. And so when somebody says hi can I pet your dog; No get away from me!

That’s because it’s worn on you.

I think it’s good to find places where you don’t have to worry about that. Where you can be replenished. Where you can get affirmed. You realize that blindness is a part of you. Just like it’s part of somebody being a man or a woman or black or white or Asian. It’s a part of who we are. We don’t have to see it as something negative

Really we’re living in a sighted world so it’s not our issue it’s the sighted world’s issue. And they are the ones that need help with getting it together.

[TR in conversation with Dr. Watson]

Can you talk a little bit more about that because a lot of people might feel like it’s the opposite because it’s like well no it’s your problem you’re the one who is blind. Why do I need to change, you’re gonna just have to deal with that.

AW:

Well that is a reality of it. I mean unfortunately we have to choose our battles so we do have to
be ready to adjust. But it’s not our fault. And we’re in a world that’s very narcissistic. People only see things and I specifically am saying the word see, people
only see things from their perspective. Sighted people only see things from their perspective and so this is not just an exercise in. Blindness versus sighted, but it’s just an exercise of us versus them or me and the other person. People really need to learn how to see things from other people’s perspective whether they be blind or deaf or wheel chair user or from another culture or from another country. I think we all have to share that responsibility but I think it’s
even more important for the dominant culture. To take some responsibility. It’s a pretty liberal perspective but I think the people in power, the people
within the dominant culture need to be able to consider how they’re going to integrate those who are in a subordinate role. Into our society. There are many many people who are very good at doing that. This is not an us against them, but there are some people that need to be informed.

so things are changing for our benefit but still there is so much more that needs to be done.

[TR in conversation with Dr. Watson]
Indeed! Cool! Very good Sir! And hopefully you just did a little more of that.

AW:
I’m glad you brought up this example because I really think it underscores a real issue within our society when it comes to independence and the kinds of obstacles that we
face as blind people. To the point where now it becomes and it could become an actual physical altercation and that’s not just talk about a slap in the face
I see some similar experiences as being out there all the time like when someone grabs me by the arm and decides that oh you’re going to come with me or they take my dogs harness and try to pull the dog where they think I should go. Or when I’m in a coffee shop and I finish putting some Splenda in my tea and somebody comes along and takes the packets without telling me and they put them in the trash.

I think it just begs for us to continue to make our voices heard. To let
people know that we want to be the captains of our own ship.

TR:
As for Liz, who by the way only lost her sight about 4 and a half years ago;
well she’s guiding her ship towards a Bachelor’s degree in Applied Psychology with a minor in Neuro Psychology.

She’s also currently serving as the President of her local Lehigh Valley chapter of the advocacy organization, the Pennsylvania Council of the Blind

She continues to spread awareness through her speaking engagements at local schools and nonprofits like the Boy & girl Scouts.

Big thanks to Liz for sharing her story.
And Dr. Watson for providing some expertise.

telling these types of stories can be really impactful especially to those who aren’t aware. But at the same time I know they can be of help to others adjusting. And Not just to blindness or disability.

Those unfamiliar with disability , tend to have a hard time seeing past their own stereotypes and immediately believe the material isn’t for them.

There could be some real gems, or useful information, included in a story that is applicable to anyone going through an adjustment, but that story is framed around the subject of blindness and well it’s no longer considered applicable.

Oh that’s not for me, that’s for those blind people. And feel free to change blind people to something else, black people, Muslims, women…

But like Dr. Watson said, we all need to do a better job at seeing the perspective of others. We have to stop thinking oh that’s a blind thing, that’s a black thing.

On that note, I’d like to invite you the listener… yes, I’m talking to you specifically…
I would love for you to check out another podcast I have the chance to work on. It’s for a site called TheReImage. The idea is that our stories as people with vision loss have the power to recreate the image and the perception that others have of what it means to live with vision loss.

The approach is to tell our stories from that perspective that unites us all… humanity. Despite what many may think, we have shared experiences.. People with vision loss have families, raise children, hold down jobs, have hobbies… you get the point.

The stories are told without focusing on the blindness but rather on the person. We call that person first storytelling.

There are two episodes up now and one actually features Dr. Watson. I think many of you would like the current episode as well….

Give it a listen and give us some feedback…
Go to TheReImage.net and look for the podcast link.

If you have any feedback on this podcast, please hit me at ReidMyMindradio@gmail.com.

I’m working on some future episodes so you should really go ahead and subscribe to the show. Then you don’t have to worry about remembering. I know that really keeps you up at night!

Anyway, time for me to get back to steering my ship!

Just call me El Capitan of Reid My Mind Radio!
All aboard!
[Audio: Ship Horn]
Peace!
———-

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Reid My Mind Radio – The Reidwind Episode

April 26th, 2017  / Author: T.Reid

Sometimes it’s worth pausing to take a look at your work. Maybe a time to reflect, re-evaluate or maybe just slow down to pick some others up as you continue along the way.

Today we rewind, or rather Reidwind, and take a look back at some of the prior episodes in the past six months.

There’s lots of ways to consume this content… Sound Cloud, Apple Podcast and others, even transcript.

Transcript

Show the transcript

TR:
For more than 2 years I have been producing this podcast.

The last 6 months or so include episodes that exemplify some of the reasons I enjoy doing this.

Today, let’s take a quick look back.

If you’re new here it’s a great way to introduce you to some of what Reid My Mind Radio is all about.

I say some because part of the stress and the joy of doing this is it’s mine… I can do whatever the Bleep I wanna do…

Like right now… I wanna drop my intro music!

[Audio Reid My Mind Theme Music…]

TR:
This podcast is a place for me to share opinions. Like…

After attending the Pennsylvania Council of the Blind conference; where people with vision loss are the main attendees, the environment is made very accessible. Unfortunately, outside of these types of experiences, this rarely occurs.

TR: From [” Are Blind Conferences Fantasy” Posted November 2, 2016](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-are-blind-conferences-fantasy/)
I recently heard these types of tours and activities or even the conferences themselves  described  as fantasy.
The idea is that this is not and will never be the real world. The real world I guess in the minds of those who believe this is fantasy will always  exclusively
cater only to those with sight and forever exclude people with vision loss.

At various times  throughout my journey with vision loss I came close to believing things can’t change. My struggle with cynicism was only made worse 
with the random encounters with those who remind me that they see me first as a blind man and their definition of that goes beyond my inability to see.
For them it’s the subconscious stereotypes and misperceptions that create their image of who I am. the things I do or don’t do are viewed through a lens
painted with layers of misinformation that so much of society has been lead to believe about blindness and disability.

TR:
Whenever possible, I like to include my daughters in my podcast.
I just enjoy their company,
when we hang out it’s always fun …
we laugh and act silly.
We share our sense of humor so it’s going to be fun.

In early December I tried to convince them
to do their own episode of the podcast as they did a few years ago, but
this time with a special twist.
From [“Join the Coalition” Posted December 31, 2017](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-join-the-coalition/)

[TReid in conversation with Raven]
Alright, I think we need to bring back Rizzle Razzle this year…

Raven:
I agree!

TReid:
…but

Raven:
Oh no…

TReid:
… you should have a guest…

Raven:
Ooooh, who is this guest?

TReid:
… me, Daddy!

{After several seconds…}

Raven
No!

[Silence]
TReid:
Yeh, I know, you’re probably just as shocked as I am!

After about 30 minutes or so I let it go…

Maybe I went about this the wrong way.
Rizzle is the oldest, she’d be able to influence Razzle.
Even though she’s away at school, we speak everyday…
I’m ready for her call usually in the morning as she’s walking to class.
That’s when I decided, I’ll get her on my side and the show will be a go…

Here’s how that went down…
[Sound of Harp indicating going back in time.]
[Sound of iPhone ringing]
TReid:
You know, why drag it out?

Riana: “No!”

[Jay Z, What more can I say…]

TR:
They came around and we
closed the year with the [Rizzle Razzle episode](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-rizzle-razzle-year-end-special/)
Even though they sabotage my microphone!

*This episode did not include transcripts as it was very much dependent on the music being discussed.

TR:
Reid My Mind is more than personal …
it’s about telling people’s stories…

People adjusting to blindness like
Robert Ott who drew from his martial arts background to move forward after losing his sight to a gun shot womb.

RO:
I couldn’t believe this was happening to me. Everything was racing through my mind. I’ve got pictures of me doing dive rolls over large groups of people and doing splits in the air. I used to go running a lot on the beach and hand springs and just all kinds of beautiful great stuff. I was so weak I couldn’t even do a push-up and now I’m blind. I can’t get around, my independence, my confidence, my self-esteem, my balance.

TR:
While these stories are specific to adjusting to blindness,
it’s easy to see how everyone has their own way of responding.

Maria Johnson, AKA Girl Gone Blind , decided to share her experiences and challenges on her own blog. …
She spoke very candidly of her adjustment process.
One memorable moment was some of her personal words of encouragement that led to a little creativity …

In [“Who is Girl gone Blind”](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-who-is-girl-gone-blind/) I included a “song” created using Maria’s words specifically “I got this”.

TR:
I don’t like to use the often referred to idea of
overcoming blindness or disability and accomplishing goals.
I like to think of working with what you have …
making the most out of your situation and counting your blessings…
Like young Ant, the first female blind rapper
From [“Meet Young Ant, First Female Blind Rapper”](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-meet-young-ant-first-female-rapper-whos-blind/)

TReid:
Young Ant in the building!

YA:
Young Ant in the building!

Treid:
Uh Oh!

So the way I look at this; Antynette is the person, Young Ant is the rapper!

YA:
[Laugh!] Yeah, that’s right!

TReid:
Alright, so first who is Antynette?

YA:
Antynette is a young lady who has been through a lot in a little bit over a year and half and is trying to find her through it with adjusting and coping
and in different techniques that I’m learning and trying to find different avenues of expressing how I’m feeling.

[Intro to “Count your Blessings” by Young Ant]

TReid:
Beautiful!
I lost my sight about 13 years ago. And so…

YA:
Really!

TReid:
Yeh so one of the things that I like to hear from people adjusting to blindness is that they don’t first start with who they are with the fact that they
are blind. You said you are a young lady!
Now, tell me who’s Young Ant?

YA:
Well Young Ant is a motivational rapper!

TR:
And then some like Doctor Dre best known for Yo MTV Raps and more, who’s adjustment process is about Fighting Back…

From[“Doctor Dre’s The Fight Back”](https://t.co/CzpxqDcUXg)

Dre:
I embrace it. And in embracing it he has put me on a path  to help other people and to reach out and express myself not  just about the type 2 Diabetes
not only about the blindness but  about when something goes on and there’s a struggle sometimes embrace your struggle to find your solutions.
It doesn’t mean it’s a guarantee for a cure or a guarantee to a perfect answer  but what it does is says you know what  I’m more than what’s going on with
me.
I can also work with this.

If you have a good relationship with your family, friends and  other people and reaching out. I learn every day from so many different people  and I pay
attention and I  try to pass on some of the knowledge of what I get  so that people can help themselves

TR:
It’s more than the adjustment experience.

We heard from
Robert Lewis sharing his story of
growing up in a segregated school for blind students.

From [“At The Intersection of Black & Blind”](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-at-the-intersection-of-black-and-blind/)

RL:
We went to one restaurant and the lady said you got to eat as fast as you can so we can get you out of here before the owner comes  back because if he
saw we had Black people here he would fire me!

TR:
In North Carolina, it was more than getting a meal.

RL:
Guys jumped out of the car and came over and they were going to beat us
all up.
We had no idea … What is this all about? Is it because we are blind; no, it’s  because you’re black and you’re blind!

TR:
Naru Kwinah and Leroy Moore, the two gentlemen producing the
documentary of the life of Joe Capers. Played a big role in artists like EnVogue, Tony Tony Tony and MC Hammer

From [“Who is Joe Capers”](http://reidmymind.com/reid-my-mind-radio-who-is-joe-capers/)

Naru:
Listen brother! His studio was called “J-Jams Studio: Joe did everything.  He had his mix board in Braille. He recorded, he engineered he mixed, he produced.
He did everything that you could every possibly do in the studio. And he had the greatest ear I have ever been around and I’ve  been doing music over 40
years of my life. If you had one note or one little thing off he knew and he would call you on it. You know because he was blind you thought you’d  get
away with stuff.

TR:
In that same episode we learn about Krip Hop from founder Leroy moore.

LM:

This year is our 10th Anniversary and we have loose chapters…

TR:
These include countries within Africa, the UK, Germany and Spain.

[Audio: “Tales of the Krip-Hop”, Rob da Noize Temple]

With the network formed by Leroy and co-founder Keith Jones, the two being disabled activists, the focus continues to be on education and advocacy.

LM:
So we saw Krip-Hop as a way to bring awareness around the history of disabled musicians from the Blues to Hip-Hop and really educate and to push the Hip-Hop
arena  around Ableism thinking around disability and to really say that disabled musicians have been here since the Blues.

TR:
That’s just a taste of some of what has appeared here on
Reid My Mind Radio over the past few months.

Subscribe now to make sure you are riding along during
the months to come.

You can subscribe via Apple Podcast or where ever you like to get your podcast content. That includes Stitcher and Tune In Radio.

Go check that out now, there’s lots of good stuff.

If you’re listening on Sound Cloud, hit that follow button.

I’m Thomas Reid
[Audio: Young Ant “Don’t get it wrong, I’m in my zone”]

[Audio: Reid My Mind theme music outro]
Peace

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